How’s the Foot Sandwich?

Canada’s ministers with both feet in their mouths

by Daniel T’seleie

Why are Canada’s federal ministers such fools? Maybe they think we just aren’t listening to them when they talk about climate change.

Rumour has it that Canada is going to pull out of the Kyoto Protocol. When questioned about this, Environment Minister Peter Kent made the most nonsensical statement about these climate change negotiations to date.

“There is an urgency to this. We don’t need a binding convention, what we need is action and a mandate to work on an eventual binding convention.”

This is just as ridiculous as being at a restaurant, and when asked by the server what you would like to order replying with, “I don’t need food, I need a ride to a restaurant and someone to bring me food once I get there.”

Kent’s ineptness with the English language earned Canada its second Fossil of the Day award, the dubious recognition given out each day to the country that does the most to obstruct progress in negotiations. We are two for two now; two days of negotiations and two Fossils. With leaders like Kent we just might sweep the podium this year.

After all, the United Nations Framework Convention on Climate Change (the body in which these negotiations proceed) is itself a mandate to work on a binding convention. And when it comes to action, well this is the 17th conference. They’ve been acting on reaching a binding convention for almost two decades.

As if this wasn’t bad enough, Kent’s partner in crime, Natural Resources Minister Joe Oliver, had to chime in with his own ill-informed statement about the Kyoto Protocol.

“What we know is that we cannot comply with it – that’s a fact.”

I apologize for shoving analogies down your throat like its food at your grandma’s house, but Oliver’s statement is like procrastinating on a school paper until the night before it’s due and then claiming there’s no possible way anyone could ever graduate.

The federal government has been quite public since it’s election in 2006 about its plans to ignore Canada’s Kyoto commitments.

I guess we shouldn’t expect anything better from Joe Oliver. This is the guy who claims Northern Alberta is “uninhabitable,” despite the fact that he thinks there are “Inuit tribes” living there.

With these two, under the guidance of the exalted Prime Minister, overseeing Canada’s climate policy (if you can call it that) and natural resource development it’s no wonder the feds put polluters before people by actively lobbying on behalf of the tar sands industry.

We can’t rely on people like this to solve the climate crisis. All they will do is protect the interests and profits of their big oil buddies. It’s time to stop asking politely and force them to take action. A good place to start is by getting involved with some of CYCC’s campaigns like Operation Oil Change and Buy Back Our Future.

One Response to “How’s the Foot Sandwich?”
  1. GreenHearted says:

    I don’t get it. Are these ministers actually as stupid and ill-informed as they sound, or have they been instructed by the Prime Cheese to sound stupid so that we’ll all just walk away, shaking our heads?

    Remember that chant, “Ooh, it’s getting hot in here”? I think we’re going to have to change it to: “Yikes, it’s getting embarrassing in here!”

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